Boys.

3 boys in my life. Each wanting to get closer to me. I'm giving them a lot of chances and my patience. I'm not sure if they like me genuinely as I like them. Sometimes I just want to be closer to them even if there's no relationship involved. Kind of like friends with benefits, but more on a spiritual level. Feeling me? In society, a girl who expresses her sexual desire for a man may make her seem like a whore, but for a guy they become labeled as perverts. How can you really tell when it's a mutual thing? If someone asked me in a subtle way that they want to "make love", I think I would consider the level of bonding we have with each other before going off to do things intimately. Sometimes I believe that there's a point where friends love each other so much that they want to express it with their bodies without going on to label each other as "girlfriend and boyfriend." I feel that I am strong enough not to have any personal attachments as long as it's declared from the beginning for mutual understanding.

I feel that I will choose one based on how I feel about them strongly. Sometimes it's just things I remember about them that will make them stand out. I'm a sucker for guys who make me laugh and who seem to hold interest in what I say even if it's insignificant. The attentive listeners and those who are eager to teach me things gets bonus points. I guess I have a teacher-student complex, but I was never interested in dating my teachers. :P

Sometimes I feel that boys don't really give me enough chances to fully know me in person instead of knowing me through someone else's words. I don't really open that quickly, unless I'm around people who are on the same level of interest or hype as me. In terms of the psychological order of intimacy, I prefer lots of eye contact and touching. :) Especially a soft grab on my arm is sort of telling me "hey."

The number one thing that guys do that turns me off: being rude (it's pretty bad if that's my first impression of you). What you do to me is what I'll do to you. Be nice and I'll be nice to you. Be respectful and you will get the same from me.


Sleep time. Zzz.